5 months into 2015

18 May

It’s been 5 months since last I wrote. Busy. Maggie. Friends. Family. Uni. All those things that make a life. 

One of the hardest things about meeting new people through uni or placement or just through the happenings of the day is that they don’t know Tilda. They don’t know me as Laura Smith, Matilda Berger’s mum.  And they won’t ever. They might not realise that Maggie has an older sister and that she died when she was 7. Why should they? And how do you bring that up? Do you? Do you pronounce yourself to those newly met people as a mother of a child that is gone? When is the right time to talk of her? 

The dreaded question – how many children do you have? Such an innocent question. I have struggled with my answer to this , how to not make the person asking feel terrible. How to honour Tilda. 

I have two daughters. Maggie is 2 and Tilda was 7 when she died in November 2013. She had a rare genetic illness called Batten Disease. Which is a shitty fucky shit of a thing. 

 She was amazing. 

For me, I am always happy to talk about Tilda. Always. Ask me about her. I will never want to stop talking about her. 

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2 Responses to “5 months into 2015”

  1. FiFi May 18, 2015 at 4:18 pm #

  2. Lisa May 19, 2015 at 10:22 am #

    Goosebumps and unimaginable conflicting emotions Laura. Love this photo of beautiful Tilda and her gorgeous mum. Hugs and love

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