Tilda’s room

25 May

Yesterday, I did the thing that I had been dreading since we knew we had to move. I took down the lights from Tilda’s wall and I took her name off her bedroom door.

Tilda’s room was incredibly special. From the minute we walked into it on the day we looked at the house, we knew that there something pretty great going on in there. There was a gorgeous view of a magnolia tree out the corner windows, a walk in robe/hidey hole and a feeling of peace and happiness. Even when we swapped her big double bed for a hospital bed and the room hosted numerous pieces of medical equipment, that magical feeling remained.

Tilda died in that room. We spent nearly every waking hour in the two weeks prior sitting in that room. Watching, waiting, surrounding her with all the love in the world. That room heard our laughter, saw our tears and felt our pain.

And when she was gone, she was still there. In the beautiful energy of that magical room. Maggie was drawn there. She would crawl in and play with Tilda’s necklaces and bracelets. I slept there some nights.

I dreaded saying goodbye to it. The thought of it would bring me to tears. But something interesting happened yesterday when I finally did that thing.

It wasn’t so bad.

Because of course we weren’t saying goodbye to her. She was coming with us. Her room was magical but she was the magician and she will always come with us wherever we go. Our new house does not have a magical room but it feels like home because we are all here together.

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10 Responses to “Tilda’s room”

  1. Jac May 25, 2014 at 4:45 pm #

  2. seaswellsunset May 25, 2014 at 4:47 pm #

    Beautiful & brave. Thank you. x

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

  3. seaswellsunset May 25, 2014 at 5:16 pm #

    My wordpress page is unfinished. It was my little project to honour my sister Joey’s 30th birthday a couple of years ago. In the midst of Mia becoming more challenging and having two kids it is STILL unfinished. Feel a little guilty that I never finished or shared it properly but love you to have a look if you are interested. Thank, Pete x

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    • teamtilda May 25, 2014 at 11:29 pm #

      I am so sorry to learn of your sister Joey. I think your project is so lovely and a wonderful way to honour her even if it is unfinished! The messages of love on there are beautiful and heartfelt and must be great comfort. Thinking of you and sending huge love. Xoxoxox

  4. Cally Berryman May 25, 2014 at 6:20 pm #

    Tilda’s room sounded perfect. May the memories of the room and gorgeous Tilda be super imposed in the new home. Love Cally xx

  5. Kat Varcoe-Cocks May 25, 2014 at 8:38 pm #

    You’ll keep the magic and she’ll always be with you won’t she. Glad the move ended up going ok. Still sad you’ve left the East. Lots of love xx

  6. Irene May 26, 2014 at 7:51 am #

    I havestarted this reply in many different ways and none are working so sending you all a big hug O…just one! where have you moved to?

  7. Juliet May 26, 2014 at 9:39 am #

    Tilda will always be with all of you, wherever you are. Al, my love

  8. Danielle x May 26, 2014 at 10:13 am #

    Goosebumps.

  9. alongthetrail July 15, 2014 at 8:28 am #

    Precious. I remember Tilda’s journey from the doose support group on yahoo groups. Her story touched me deeply. What a precious and brave little girl. She will always be with you, no matter where you go. Many hugs!

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